On the Mires Briggs test I'm an INFP. Maybe you can relate. It means that I find the necessary task of administrative work as tedious as relocating a pile of rice using nothing but tweezers. It means that if I don't get any alone time throughout the day, I'll be awake until 2 am processing through whatever junk I've been holding on to. It means that my favorite thing in the world is cycling through a thousand-and-a-half bad ideas in order to get to the golden nugget of a good idea.
All of these things take time that I just don't have.
I recently started trying to "manage" my time. I came up with this method myself. Here's what it looks like:
It doesn't work because I'll get a notification to do something and I don't do it because I'd rather work on something more interesting like starting a new blog in order to document my streams of consiousness and practice writing.
Writing is something that I'm supposedly good at (If Mires Briggs is to be believed) But I have my doubts. Maybe you've been in my shoes where you feel like theres this immense potential to do something extraordinary, but in order to tap into that potential you need to have the will-power to actually practice things.
Not my strong suit obviously.
But I keep telling myself that you need to have a few failures in order to be successful. Steve Jobs was kicked out of his own company, after all. But apparently Steve Jobs was a huge jerk too... I forgot where I was going with that.
I guess it all plays into the fact that you need to fail before you succeed. you need to be mature enough to view life's failures as science experiments and not math equations.
Math equations have a wrong answer, but the result of a science experiment is always useful, even if it's a failure.
It still costs you something though.
That's the part that bothers me the most. All these failures that could have been successes if I was willing to lose more of myself to it... And if I had the time. That's the real kicker.
for now maybe I should be more focused in my experimentation. Don't try to do 3 new things at once. Let's start with 1 and see where it goes. If I have time. Ugh. I'm going to wake up one day on my 70th birthday and wonder where all those ideas went. I can generate a thousand ideas, but If none of them substantiate, then I might as well have been playing video games for 40 years instead.
Not that video games are pointless. However, I have been considering dropping that habit. Save some money, maybe pour that money into a business of some sort...
I'm going to stop writing because I really need to get back to work.